How have things been great?!? Well....for starters...the last thing I go to bed thinking about and the first thing I think of when I wake up HAVE NOT BEEN ABOUT HATING MYSELF!!!! YAY! This has spilled over into the rest of my day too. I am finally going sometimes a few hours without thinking about food, how fat I am, etc. IT IS AMAZING. Absolutely life changing. I am not writing in a food journal anymore which even though it was SO helpful at the start....had turned into a restriction tool.
I AM INTUITIVELY EATING! Or at least trying to. It is really hard to KNOW what your body is wanting. Am I full? Am I hungry? But it is getting easier......at first I dropped some major poundage......I was eating too healthy....I was full all the time but I was full from eating large salads. So I hiked up my calorie intake again and I feel much better. Lately I have been craving chocolate. I have NEVER been a huge chocolate fan. But lately I am going CRAZY for chocolate! Not a bad thing since my dad gives me chocolate bars weekly! haha! :D And guess what?!?! I am letting myself eat them! YAY!
I have been so stressed out about life though......I am not doing as well in school as I would hope to be doing. I had a piano recital last week which I was cramming for. I can't find a job! :( I am also.....drum roll please..........IN THIS PLAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am SUPER excited....I don't have any big roles (i started too late to audition). But I am a crowd person, slave, and mob person. Being the slave is the most fun! They have REAL WHIPS that they use! This play is AUTHENTIC! And best of all....it is changing my life. Never has the love of Christ been so real to me. I cry after every practice out of sheer joy and adoration for our loving Saviour. If it is in your city....please go. Not only is the story the best....but their is pyrotechnics, dancing, acrobatics, etc!!! It is like a Cirque de Sole show!!!!!!!!!! I am loving it! However....it is kind of stressing me out because we have practice a lot....but if it cuts into my studying time...it is totally worth it. This is for something WAY greater than perfect grades!
Write now, the Lord is just teaching me to rely on Him and ask Him for help. I am also starting to be a part of a Bible study with my sisters and friends. I LOVE IT!
This is the workbook for the study. |
God is working SO much in my life right now. It is incredible. He is answering all my prayers and strengthening me for the future. I hope and pray that you all find the same strength, hope, freedom, happiness, joy, appreciation for life, and respect for your bodies that I have found.
Love this quote: "The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." -Dolly Parton. I would have to agree with Miss Parton!
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